Hat Writes Stuff

Title: Pack Dynamics
Author: Almighty Hat
Fandom: Jurassic World
Characters: Barry, Delta, Claire Dearing, Zach Mitchell, Gray Mitchell, Vic Hoskins
Word Count: 3,247
Rating: PG-13 for violence
Pairing(s): Gen
Warnings: Canon-Typical violence (both canons), Canonical human character death

Author's Notes: I wrote this because I needed to know what happened, but it didn't fit in with Found In Translation-- which is all third-person-limited, from Owen's point of view. I liked how it turned out enough to polish it up and post it.

Also, I felt like I owed Tigriswolf Hoskins' death scene.


Summary: “Where are they going?” one of the mercenaries asks, on guard.

“Delta likes Barry best, and she was getting hissy. He’s gonna take her for a run, I think.”

While Owen waxes introductory with the Indominus Rex, Barry and Delta (and Claire, Zach, and Gray) have a little adventure of their own.

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( Barry leads Delta back to the paddock, parking while confused mercenaries look on, then going up to knock on the driver’s side window of the emergency vet van that Ms. Dearing has laid claim to. )

Title: Smells Like Hope Part 8: Meanwhile
Author: Almighty Hat
Fandom: Girl Genius
Characters: Jorgi, Klaus Wulfenbach, a couple of Geisterdamen, Mr. Rovainen, Dr. Bren, Boris Dolokhov, sundry background characters
Word Count: 5,018
Rating: G to PG
Pairing(s): Agatha/Jorgi, background
Warnings: Mentions of the Other and associated Nope, Klaus Wulfenbach and associated perceptions of morality, Mad Science of the 'victim strapped to a slab' variety (with attractive human-looking female victims), canon-typical violence and associated redshirt death, a female monster in a violent wrestling match with a male monster, syringes/needles, mind control and someone trying desperately to subvert it.

Author's Notes: With thanks to Para and Lilithqueen for inspiration and gracious permission, and Celaeno for beta-reading. (Sorry I started you reading a fifteen-year-long comic archive!)

All canon characters, situations, and plot elements are property of Studio Foglio; no money is made from this fanwork and no infringement is intended.

Summary: Klaus Wulfenbach won’t accuse the Geisterdamen of serving the Other without conclusive proof. Geisterdamen can command their Goddess’s ‘lesser servants’ (slaver wasps and revenants). The mindless, shambling revenant of the Other War is an outlier; hardly anybody knows that most revenants look just like everybody else.

Proof happens.

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Title: Smells Like Hope Part 1: Fear
Author: Almighty Hat
Fandom: Girl Genius
Characters: Agatha Heterodyne, Jorgi, Adam Clay, Lilith Clay, The Enigma, Omar Von Zinzer, Moloch Von Zinzer, Mister Tock, Hugo Glassvitch, Silas Merlot, Tarsus Beetle, Klaus Wulfenbach, Gilgamesh Wulfenbach, Nameless Background Jäger, Boris Dolokhov (has no real lines)
Word Count: 7,114
Rating: G
Pairing(s): Agatha Heterodyne/Jorgi
Warnings: This is an easy one to warn for: if you were okay reading the first volume of Girl Genius, you should be okay reading this. Canon-typical violence, Von Zinzers being jerks, Tarsus Beetle's on-panel death, Agatha's locket-driven self-esteem issues, and Klaus Wulfenbach's A+ parenting.

Author's Notes: Based on the Locket prompt by Para, here, with pairing borrowed from Lilithqueen's "You're dating the HELP?!" series, this AU grew legs and ran away with me. Currently there are six parts written and posted, a seventh in the late writing stages, and six more parts outlined. I will keep writing this until I feel like I'll run it up a lamppost if I go any further.

Also, some overall series notes, I occasionally play fast and loose with the timeline, and no, I don't know what I'm doing about the time windows yet. (Maybe I will when the Paris arc is over.) I have only just ordered the novels, so incorporating novel canon will be slow going-- however, I'm going to take the unusual-for-me approach here and say if novel and comic contradict, comic wins. (Usually I just hit 'frappe' on multimedia canons.) That's because this is a straight-up canon divergence AU-- unless I have to declare Time Nonsense, everything happening in canon away from the viewpoint characters is happening in this fic. Since the comic is free to double-check, comic beats novel.

Many thanks to Celaeno for beta-reading. (Sorry I started you reading a fifteen-year-long comic archive!)

All canon characters, situations, verbatim dialogue, and plot elements are property of Studio Foglio; no money is made from this fanwork and no infringement is intended.

Summary: Agatha Clay is mugged, but has her property retrieved by something she didn't know existed-- a dashing Jägermonster. She's not sure why he's being so nice, but it's already a terrible day and it's only seven in the morning, so Agatha will take it. He escorts her to class and canon goes gently sideways. (Includes a lot of plot and dialogue from Volume 1 of Girl Genius.)

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Title: Smells Like Hope Part 3: Epistolary
Author: Almighty Hat
Fandom: Girl Genius
Characters: Agatha Heterodyne, Jorgi, Adam Clay, Lilith Clay, Minsk, Von Pinn, OC citizen of Zumzum (Rurik the postman, who doesn't get named yet)
Word Count: 7,927
Rating: G
Pairing(s): Agatha/Jorgi, background Adam Clay/Lilith Clay
Warnings: Vaguely Victorian social mores about Writing To Boys and associated little white lies, gratuitous italics, accidental irony, something that would be fantastic racism if not for the whole super soldier raiding party thing, a little angst in the fluff, obfuscating stupidity (and failures at same), abandonment issues, and a very oblique reference to child death. I am also playing fast and loose with the timeline.

Author's Notes: With thanks to Para and Lilithqueen for inspiration and gracious permission, and Celaeno for beta-reading. (Sorry I started you reading a fifteen-year-long comic archive!)

All canon characters, situations, and plot elements are property of Studio Foglio; no money is made from this fanwork and no infringement is intended.

Summary: Agatha Clay has excellent penmanship and a turn of phrase honed by being Tarsus Beetle's unpaid secretary. Jorgi is shockingly literate for someone who ran away to join the army when he was fifteen. They are young (relatively), kilometers apart, and desperate to know every stupid little thing about each other. Largely fluff, occasionally deeply ironic.

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Title: Smells Like Hope Part 5: Debrief
Author: Almighty Hat
Fandom: Girl Genius
Characters: Jorgi, General Khrizhan, General Goomblast, General Zog, Klaus Wulfenbach
Word Count: 3,909
Rating: G
Pairing(s): Background Agatha/Jorgi
Warnings: Gratuitous Jägerspeak (four of them in one conversation I had to read the whole thing aloud and did you know Jäger accents vary by individualmanaged.

Author's Notes: With thanks to Para and Lilithqueen for inspiration and gracious permission, and Celaeno for beta-reading. (Sorry I started you reading a fifteen-year-long comic archive!)

All canon characters, situations, verbatim dialogue, and plot elements are property of Studio Foglio; no money is made from this fanwork and no infringement is intended.

Summary: Jorgi tells the Jägergenerals that he accidentally found a Heterodyne, and that she needs some bodyguards. Subtle, trustworthy, Jäger bodyguards.

He also tells them he's been accidentally long-distance-dating the young Heterodyne.

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Title: To Be Free, Part One: Lucky Bird, Inside a Gilded Cage
Author: Almighty Hat
Fandom: Aladdin (film, series, & sequels)
Characters: Jasmine, Mozenrath, Jafar, Sultan, Rajah, Xerxes, Destane
Word Count: 14,041
Rating: PG (read fanfiction with your kids, folks)
Pairing(s): None, but with discarded consideration of Jasmine/Mozenrath (thus tagged 'het technically')
Warnings: Implications of child abuse and abandonment, discussion of child marriage, age difference just wide enough to feel not-okay, and I'm gonna say 'Jafar' counts as a warning, even though he doesn't appear frequently in this part.

Author's Notes: This one has been in my head for a LONG time. The title is taken from a deleted song from the movie ultimately used in the Aladdin Musical Spectacular stage show in California Adventure; the subtitles for each part are snipped from the lyrics. This first part is packed full of adolescence, foreshadowing, Chekov's Guns, and occasional flashes of deep, deep irony.

PLEASE NOTE the presence of a NEW TAG, '!check warnings before reading!' Usually if you can handle the canon I'm writing for, the fic should have nothing terribly upsetting. To Be Free, however, includes some heavy stuff. The first part is the lightest.

May 2020 Update: To Be Free was written before Disney's 2020 terms-of-service update (to which I did not agree, though only time and contract disputes will tell if "Yeah but I didn't sign your TOS" will hold up in court) and is only remaining posted online because I do not believe Disney would be particularly interested in appropriating a canon-divergence AU using material from an animated series they've been pretending doesn't exist since about, oh, late 2001.

Summary: It was a lovely day in young Princess Jasmine's garden, and then the boy sorcerer fell out of the air.

Act one of a three-act canon divergence story where Mozenrath and Jasmine meet at seventeen and thirteen, respectively, and strike up a clandestine friendship because they're both bored and lonely. Covers almost three years.

( It was a nice enough day to be out in the gardens; Jasmine had managed to excuse herself from her lessons by saying that Rajah had seemed restless that morning, as though he needed exercise or something to chase. )

Title: To Be Free, Part Three: Free to Throw Away a Treasure
Author: Almighty Hat
Fandom: Aladdin
Characters: Aladdin, Jasmine, Mozenrath, Genie, Jafar, Sultan, Destane, Abu, Xerxes, Carpet, Iago, Rajah
Word Count: 13,608
Rating: Harder PG than the last part.
Pairing(s): Technically, Aladdin/Jasmine and Jasmine/Mozenrath.
Warnings: CHARACTER DEATH. Also, again with the age disparities (Jasmine is just barely sixteen, Al is eighteen, Mozenrath is twenty; not too bad but not legal in my state), implications of consent issues, violence and the aftermath of violence, abusive parental relationship, a touch of body horror, and again I am warning for Jafar, Destane, and CHARACTER DEATH.

May 2020 Update: To Be Free was written before Disney's 2020 terms-of-service update (to which I did not agree, though only time and contract disputes will tell if "Yeah but I didn't sign your TOS" will hold up in court) and is only remaining posted online because I do not believe Disney would be particularly interested in appropriating a canon-divergence AU using material from an animated series they've been pretending doesn't exist since about, oh, late 2001.

Author's Notes: The final part! This part is not light reading, but you'll notice I didn't warn for an unhappy ending. Further Author's Notes and the full lyrics of To Be Free will be included at the end of the work (not included in the word count), for all your curiosity-satisfying needs.

Summary: Jasmine's sixteenth birthday starts off with a reasonable plan and an engagement announcement, and then Jafar gets the lamp and everybody's plans go right out the window.

Act three of a three-act canon divergence story where Mozenrath an Jasmine met three years before the events of "Aladdin." Contains selected scenes of unchanged or nearly-unchanged dialogue where plot relevant as well as veering off into brand new territory. Covers about twelve hours of one day.

( It was Jasmine’s sixteenth birthday, the last day for her to marry and still be within the limits of the law. She and Mozenrath had kept Aladdin up late last night, outlining their plan. )

Further Author's Notes: Now that you've made it this far, I can tell you the English Class theme of this story. The film Aladdin was about disguises, truth versus lies, and being yourself. To Be Free is partly about truth and lies, but mostly about captivity versus freedom, only a secondary theme in the movie. Everyone in this story, whether or not I want you to root for them or not, is a prisoner somehow-- to social status, to a job, to obligation or duty, to a magic lamp. Some of them are satisfied with their cages and prisons. Some of them would gnaw off a limb to get out of their traps. Some of them would be willing to bear up for the rest of their lives, if they could free someone else.

This story has been in my head for at least five years, and spilled out into the keyboard over nine days. Emily kept me going with encouragement and amazing feedback like "I've never even seen a Mozenrath episode, how are you making me ship them so hard?" which, really, is a super-awesome compliment to get. The total word count over all three parts is 41,826. To Be Free is almost eighty pages. I have a few terribly vague ideas for continuations (it'd almost be unfair not to introduce Sadira to this universe), but I make no promises as to what or when.

Title: Nice Car
Fandom: Transformers 2007 Movie/Knight Rider crossover
Characters: Bumblebee, Mikaela, Sam, Michael, Kitt
Word Count: I have failed to count. Short.
Rating: G
Warnings: Gratuitous F-body description
Summary: Really, when you get right down to it, isn't everybody a little more than meets the eye?

Author's Notes: For Emily, because it is ALL HER FAULT. Her fault. Not mine. I just get these mental images. She puts them there.

Disclaimer: Transformers and all related indicia are property of HasTak and Paramount Pictures; Knight Rider and all related indicia are property of Glen Larson and Universal Studios Television. No copyright infringement is intended and no profit is made. A vague disclaimer is nobody's friend.

(  Two sports cars sat in the parking lot of the fast-food restaurant, low-slung and sleek. )

Author's Notes, 2013: This was my first foray into Transformers fanfiction, and I think it's held up well. What TF Movieverse fic I've written is all solidly based around the first movie; I didn't like the second and haven't seen the third, so I'm content to be solidly Jossed a lot of the time.